Three Years later...
Well well well....it has been close the 3 years since my last
confession journal entry. Proably a bad thing, but something I tend to do in the way I am wired to dealing with life. Lots of things have happened. Not sure if I should go over them now or later....so I play it by ear and if something just happens to slip in, well....it does and we will deal with it accordingly. I have lost touch with several people that were at one time considered by me "pillars of my personal community". I do stay "in touch" from afar (fb) but I rarily reach out. I have re-examined myself and started therapy with a lovely lady that is more like a freind than a medical professional. I now realize that I probably should have taken advantage of this lovely tool a good long time ago, back after my Grandmother English and father passed in 1989....but like so many others I did not. I see now like everybody else I know that has had therapy and seeks to work forward, leaving the past to its own devices can be difficult and "one" needs to be in the right "frame of mind" to accomplish this goal/reach the proper threashold. Over the past two years it has helped me understand myself; sometimes chastising sometimes praising myself. I have learned my "approaches" and the pitfalls that often ensue from them, but enough about theraphy......for now. Tonight, being Tonight, I think I should mention my reason for reconnecting with the journal. I want to remember my thoughts and organize them. I face main problems and i need to get back to solving them. I think journaling will help me do that, it certainly can't hurt.
So here we go..
So here we go..
- while thumbing thru the Vatican Museum Collections Exhibition catalog, I thought about my prof from St. Andrews, Ann Woodson...Anna as we called her...wondering what she is doing and if she still creates and what that is these days
- also about Sitzo de Rachewiltz and my months in Northern Italy and how that so influences my life to this day
- thinikng about Mothers doctor appt. in the morning and how My role as here care provider is shifting. I am so used to her taking care of me...it is difficult and emotionally upsetting for me to realize I must do this, it may not get worse , but it will not get better.
- Matt, my little condrundum wrapped in an enigma....nuf said
- how I am gettting a bit tired and should try to go to sleep......